How to reach the top

By MEL COLBY

VERYONE is aware that John Diefenbaker is up to his neck in croco-

diles as he battles to retain the . Tory leadership. Now there is discussion as to’ who _ Will eventually succeed Lés- ter .B. Pearson. When the choiees are made: the maniac circle will be complete, tem- porarily at least.

Take Mr. Pearson. The Liberal machine, in its effort to create the illusion of a statesman, has buffed and polished him as carefully as a paste diamond. But in } -spite of the attempts to make him . glitter he sounds and acts like an American im- port; and the Americans near- - ly always export their worst . and not their best products and ideas. Invariably he . sounds as if he was a mem- _ ber of Dean Rusk’s staff. And . poorly briefed at that, unless one is addicted to speeches of truly numbing banality.

A recent speech by Mr. Pearson about charges of graft and corruption on Par- | liament Hill was illuminating.

Members of Parliament, he . said, are under “greater pres- sure” than average citizens. With that in mind there shouldn’t be a dry eye in } heaven when the angels con-

template the self-sacrifices of our “MP’s. Perhaps the unem- Ployed ought to take up a collection for them.

In any case, since there are going to be some changes in leadership, here are a few set rules for those who as- pire to reach the top:: »

First, and this is the basic, prime consideration, the can- didate must be “safe.” The “safe” candidate is one who never defied or disobeyed the machine; who never bowed to the temptation of honor, decency or principle; who never did what is right just

because he believed in the right but rather did what he was told — in the full inter- ests of the machine.

Second, the candidate must not be tempted by ideas. If he reads books he is automa- tically suspect, allowances being made for such works of art as Fanny Hill or any-

thing by Ian Fleming. Nor .

should the candidate fre- quent art galleries unless he doesn’t mind being con- sidered highly questionable; if he is given to reading poetry he is doomed; if he argues out of logic and rea- son, he is dangerous, and if he puts two and two toge- ther and comes up with four, he is finished.

Third, the candidate must show absolute resistance to compassion and humanitar- ianism. A devotion to justice is regarded as de facto proof of treasonable thoughts; an interest in peace means secret ties with subversion; and love for people means a one- way ticket back to where he came from.

Finally, he must be dedi- cated to the service of the rich, although he may render the necessary lip service to labor .and even be _ photo- graphed with “safe” union

leaders; but he must prove

by deed and direction that his first allegiance is to the vested interests.

If he follows these simple rules he will be eligible for a “yea” vote in a smoke- filled room. And when he does make his bid he’ll know in advance that the two old-

‘line parties automatically eli-

minate scientists, artists, phi- losophers, writers and poets as being unfit for high office.

. As a matter of fact, an orang-outang could make a leadership bid if he knew the right people and learned the alphabet.

AUTOMATIC SUPERMART

HERE SOON

OUSEWIVES will soon be

shopping for groceries in

@ Supermarket without clerks, without shopping baskets or buggies and with all the pro- ducts behind glass. What’s more, an electronic device will tote up the bill and record the charges in place of the usual checkout counter.

Such automatic supermarkets are coming within the next 5 or 10 years, say the experts. In fact, experimental models of them are being tried in France and Sweden. ~

“Of course, the ultimate step may be elimination of all super- markets,” said Herbert R. Brin- berg, who as market research director of American Can Com-

pany studies such possibilties.

“I mean it very seriously. If people become accustomed to buying without touching, there’s no reason they couldn’t get used to ordering by video telephone two or three times a week.”

Brinberg sees an automated supermarket as working some- thing like this; —

The shopper enters a display section that occupies a fraction of the floor space now required.

Products are arrayed in cus- tomary groupings — preserves, breakfast foods, frozen concent- rates, and the like — behind a transparent partition dotted with key slots.

The shopper takes a key from

‘her purse. The key would be

somewhat larger than a house key to accommodate a micro- miniature electronic tape record- ing device. Choosing her brand of coffee, the shopper inserts the key into the slot in the parti- tion, turns and withdraws it. Then she moves on to the soups, detergents and so on, repeating the operation.

At the conclusion of her aisle-

. touring, she inserts the key into

an electronic scanner, charge- reckoning and cleaning device hooked into a computer that starts things moving-—in a large warehousing zone of the store:

This is an artist’s conception of posed for the Scarborough district-in Metro

ready within five years. —

OUT OF THIS WORLD

a futuristic apartment and hotel project that has been pro- politan Toronto. lt will cost.$17,000,000:.and-would be .

HELP WITH HOMEWORK Blair Gunn, 11, of the Vancouver suburb of Ladner, ua his homework with his pet owl Sammy looking over his should When not riding on the boy’s shoulder the owl flies around !

Gunn home.

Who wants to return to good old days’?

By JACK PHILLIPS

HERE has been more revo- lutionary change in the past 100 years than in the

previous 2,000 years. This holds true for the application of the physical sciences, technology, productive capacity and man’s knowledge of the world in every sphere of human endeavor. |

Any man who is 50 years old can remember when the radio was being developed for popu- lar use. There was no television then and you couldn’t travel by plane. The automobile age was just arriving and we still dealt at the corner- grocery store. There was no_ neighborhood supermarket or suburban shop- ping plaza.

Every time somebody tells me about going back to the good old days, I wonder, what good days he is referring to. I don’t want to scrap the machinery we have today for the more primitive methods of yesterday. I like my automobile, my tele- vision, my: small transistor radio and my precision camera. None of these things were pos- sible for, the average worker when I was in school, because of price or because they were

mot in mass production.

And when they talk about the good old days, do they mean the depression and the Hungry

_ Thirties? Or the time (not so

long ago) when on most jobs you were fired if you spoke up for the union? Or World War II, which pulled us out of relative economic stagnation?

No matter how necessary the

war, no one'in his right mind can picture war as the good old days, the happy days. Too many

=

were killed and maimed; — much was destroyed. The, feat of naziism was a i) for human progress, but |) has any lesson, it is that itt, never happen again. If it “) happen again, the weapol destruction will be so fal, vanced that the weapons in World War II will see )) historic. Humanity will be to face with self-destructiO™ | :

I have an idea that this ing for the good old days presents a fear of, or a to adjust to, the most 1) tionary changes in this P*” the social changes.

In the good old days was still the British Emp! French Empire, the Belgi@ y pire and the Dutch Emig There was no independent ! f- no Indonesia, no Cong /— People’s China, no Korea, Vietnam. Britain controlle¢ Suez and there was no N@ 7 If the Cubans got out of ih mere threat of sending th® Marines was sufficient to. tain the status quo. - é

The average Canadian fi have to worry about the 0” bomb, the problem of * | Canada, or the U.S. bombil North Vietnam.

BH] It would be nice to &) from tension by retreatifl f the past, but escape is TA sible. It is better to recy that we live in a changing ¢ ia and to grasp the essence % jj change. The most significa?" ) ment in the change is th@ ) people have greater pow” determine the course of hl? It is wrong to seek an ‘ from this responsibility. jet better to accept the ch@ of our day.

: | é March 26, 1965—PACIFIC TRIBUNE—PO9"