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The exogamous families’ page Parenthése

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Thanks mom, merci papa |!
lam becoming fluent in French |!

e As the non-francophone par-
ey ent of a child living in an ex-
ogamous household, one can
certainly be proud (and even brag!)
to have a child who can easily navi-
gate back and forth between two
languages (or more). Nevertheless the
same parent may, from time to time,
feel quite overwhelmed, inadequate,
isolated, frustrated and discouraged
with all of this Moliére’s language busi-
ness! La francophonie can, in fact, be
a bit much at times when one can't
understand what is going on or does
not feel part of the fun!

“My child missed pyjama day because
| did not understand the message sent
home in French. He was quite upset.”

“| would very much like to volunteer at
my child’s preschool but | feel so intimi-
dated because | may not understand
what is expected of me, but everyone
else will..."

“When | want to read in French with my
child, she keeps on correcting me or
asks me to stop reading!”

“How canthelp my child learn to speak
French when | do not speak it well my-
self?"

These are typical of comments heard
from non-francophone parents. De-
spite the occasional worry, there are
winning approaches for non-franco-
phone parents that will support and
encourage their child’s language de-
velopment process as well as ease
some of their own anxieties.

Create a positive environment

The learning of French, like any
second language, requires that it be
pertinent, interesting but most import-
antly presented within a secure en-
vironment for the child. These three
elements are important ones to focus
on in order to promote successful lan-
guage acquisition. This article will focus
specifically on the aspect of how to
create a secure environment for the
child's learning process — an environ-
ment which must be established by
both parents.

While the francophone parent's
challenge may be to find more op-
portunities to speak French with the
child, one of the key contributions on
the part of the non-francophone par-
ent is to aim at establishing a positive
and comfortable environment for the
child, where speaking French feels
normal and acceptable wherever the
family may be. By simply embracing
and respecting those moments when
the francophone parent (or anyone
else) addresses the child in French —-
when playing a game, visiting grand-
maman, running into friends at the park
or going through the bed time routine
— the non-francophone parent is subtly
setting up the child for success.

It’s all about your attitude

It is imperative that both parents be
very clear about their desire to see their
young one speak French, and work to-
wards creating the appropriate atmos-
phere. If the child senses some reti-
cence on the part of one parent and
thinks that he/she is making someone

by Michelle Marsan

feel left out, the child might not be at
ease to speak French as it will not feel
so emotionally safe for him/her to learn,
which subsequently might slow down
his/her progress.

To the preschooler, the secure en-
vironment may be established by the
parents’ words, actions and attitude,
which demonstrate that French should
be a part of his/her life now, and not
just that it will be useful some day in
the future. In addition, letting your child
know that you would also like to im-
prove your French language skills could
be very stimulating for the both of you
since children love to teach their par-
ents what they have learned.

Celebrate both languages

In an exogamous household, it is
crucial that each of the parents’ re-
spective languages be respected,
valued, and celebrated equally. The
subtle messages that we send our kids
are very important and must always
positively reinforce an environment for
learning not only a language, but all
aspects of the child’s life.

P.S. As for the missed preschool py-
jama party and the undecipherable
French note, why not pair up with a
francophone parent with whom you
could be in touch for a bit of support
whenever the Francophone parent is
not available. Who knows, you could
even get invited into the classroom to
flip some extraordinaires crépes your
OWN fabulous way! =