Newspaper editors ate interest-
ing creatures. I’ve always pic-
tured editors as a gruff, grumbl-
ing overweight species — kind of
rumpled-looking, with five
o’clock shadows and cigar stubs
clenched in their teeth. Yes, the
female ones, too. Real editors
aren’t like that. The editor of this
paper is.actually fairly normal in
appearance — that is, children
don’t shriek in horror when he
enters a room.

Notice that I don’t mention his
name. That’s because he’s never
fully explained the legalities of
libel and slander, nor the standard
length of the resulting prison
sentences, though I've asked a
few times. His name is listed on
page six, anyway. For the pur-
pose of this column, we’ll just
cali him... hmmm, let’s see, pick
any name out of the air. We'll
call him "Mike".

Mike is often found hiding in a
dark commer of the office, hunched
over a keyboard or mumbling
into a phone. This is common
newspaper practice, keeping the

Down through the ages there
have been “experts” on just about
every conceivable subject under
the sun. And while some of these
people actually seemed to know
what they were talking about,
there are thousands of examples of
misinformation, disinformation,
misunderstanding, miscalculation,
prognostication, and even a few
outright boo-boos and plain old
lies,

At the Institute of Expertology in

New York, New York, they’ve

discovered that the experts are

wrong without regard to race,
creed, colour, sex, discipline, spe-
cialty, country, culture, or century.

Furthermore, they are wrong about

theories, dates, geography, both

the future and the past, and at best
are misleading about the present,
not to mention neat week.

The institute does not claim that
all experts everywhere are always
wrong; although their scientifical-
ly selected random sample has yet
to turn up an expert who is actual-
ly right, they do concede that the
experts are occasionally right,
maybe even as much as half the
time. But it’s the other half of the
time that makes for some interest-
ing reading. For example:

The Saturday Review in London

in 1858 said of Charles Dickens
(author of A Christmas Carol),

“We do not believe in the perma-
nence of his reputation.”

William Styron, McGraw-Hill
editor, rejected Thor Heyerdahl’s
novel Kon-Tiki in 1947 because,
“This is a long, solemn, tedious

8 Terrace Reviews — Wednesday. November 13, 1991

editor away from the scrutinizing
eyes of the public. And Mike’s
pretty busy — there’s always a
deadline hanging over his head
— but he doesn’t snarl at inter-
Tuptions, a suspicious virtue if
you ask me.

Through the four years I’ve
worked with Mike, I’ve noticed
that he thinks a lot. He thinks
more than he speaks, a character-
istic I hopelessly aspire toward.
Because of all this thinking, he
occasionally utters profound
words of wisdom, also known as
"Mikeisms". While he’s spouting
these "Mikeisms" around the
office, much of the staff ignores
him, particularly when there’s
cookies near the coffee pot.
(Cookies in the office override
most other priorities.) Not me.
Besides the fact that I recognize
brilliance when I see it, he’s my
boss and I value my continuing
employment. What follows are
some Mikeisms that come to
mind:

Mikeism #1 "Everything is the
editor’s fault.” Mike once said

BS cb TRAST See

Pacific voyage best suited, I would
think, to some kind of drastic
abridgement in a journal like the
National Geographic.” (Rand
McNally published the novel,
which immediately leapt to the top
of the New York Times bestseller
list, and stayed there for more than

a year).

«Hans Friedenthal, professor at
Berlin University in 1914 said,
“Brain work will cause her (the
new woman) to become bald,

while increasing masculinity and

contempt for beauty will induce
the growth of hair on the face, In
the future, therefore, women will
be bald and will long mustaches
and patriarchal beards.”

«Dr, Benjamin Spock, American

pediatrician, was quoted in 1979

as saying, “Biologically and tem-

peramentally... women were made —

to be concerned first and foremost
with child care, husband and home
care,”
eCharles Taze Russell, American
religious leader, 1910, “The deliv-
erance of the saints must take
place some time before 1914.”
«Charles Taze Russell, 1923,

“The deliverance of the saints
must take place some time after

1914,”

*A Decca Recording Company
executive said of the Beatles in
1962, “We don’t like their sound.
Groups of guitars are on the way
out.”

Jim Denny, manager of the
Grand Ole Opry, who fired Elvis
Presicy after only one perfor-

this with a shrug, when he was
wrongly accused of journalistic
fault. It made sense, Ever since, I
have attributed everything, from
flash floods and earthquakes to -
starving third world countries, to
editors — namely, Mike.

Mikeism #2 "There is no sen-
tence too short." That’s an exact
quote. I didn’t have the heart to
tell him it could be condensed to
"No sentence is too short.”

Mikeism #3 "Oh." This is
Mike’s favourite "ism". Give
Mike a tantalizing crumb of
earth-shattering. news, and his
inevitable reaction is a non-com-
mittal "oh", stretched out to two
syllables. Any further curiosity is
expressed as "Oh?", accompanied
by a raised eyebrow. This way,
Mike keeps his opinion to him-
self. Or it may simply relate to
the above short-sentence quirk.

There have been other, more
-worldly Mikeisms uttered, but for
some reason, these stuck like
gum on a shoe. And I figure
Mike has covered the basic rules
of news-reporting with those

three points: The editor is the
boss, Keep it short. Leave your
own opinion out of it.

Of course, none of the above
applies to this column, where I’m
pretty much allowed free reign,
within twenty column inches.
And it’s always my opinion.

Mike will see this before you
do, and he may hesitate to print

it. But he doesn’t have anything
else under the heading of "The

On top of that, what does the God
of the Bible think about Laurel
Gregg, her family and her friends?
They are deeply loved by God.
“For God so loved the world that
he gave his one and only Son that
whoever believes in Him should
not perish but have eternal life.”
(Qohn 3:16) If God loves them
how can we do anything else.

So let’s be very clear on one
thing: most of the actions toward
Laurel Gregg, her family and her
friends as they were described in
the Terrace Review are not Chris-
tianity at all; therefore I, and any
Bible believing Christian, would
denounce such actions for what
they are.

Shortly after I put on the New
Age Seminar I called Laurel and
we talked about the harassment

she said she had been getting in
the previous months. I gave her
my name and phone number and
told her that is she found out who
these people were that I would
personally defend her and her
family against such people and
such actions,

I think it is important to note just
‘ for the record, that in the six hours

; of our New Age Seminar, which
mance, said in 1954,“You ain't covered a very wide range of
goin’ nowhere... son. You ought to metaphysical activities, organiza-

PIER Mires sb eotear Ee OH

go back to drivin’ a trick.”

The New York Daily News
assessed the talents of Willie
Mays in 1951 as, “Just so-so in
centre field.”

*Tris Speaker, manager of the
Cleveland Indians, commented in

1921 on Babe Ruth’s plans to
change from a pitcher to an out-
fielder, “Ruth made a great mis-
take when he gave up pitching.
Working once a week, he might
have lasted a long time and
become a great star.”

Gardiner Greene Hubbard in
assessing the telephone invented
by his prospective son-in-law,
Alexander Graham Bell, “Only a
toy.” He urged Bell to devote his
time to other pursuits.

Editor of the Daily Express,
London, refusing to see John
Logie Baird (inventor of the tele-
vision), “For God’s sake go down
to reception and get rid of a
lunatic who’s down there, He says
he’s got a machine for seeing by

. wireless! Watch him — he may
have a razor on him.”

Dr. S.L. Katzoff, faculty member
of San Francisco Institute of
Human Relations, 1940, said, (in
response to the question: Can kiss-
ing transmit contagious diseases?):

“A genuine kiss generates so
much heat it destroys germs.”

So there you have it, the lesson
here is to take the experts with a
grain of salt. And that's my
“expert” opinion!

tions and philosophies, Nirvana
Metaphysics came up only once as
a 30-second note in passing. Lau-
rel and her centre certainly were
not “one of the topics of discus-
sion”. Contrary to the information
given Laurel as to the availability
of some tapes of the seminar, we
have never released any tapes to

‘the public or to anyone else, but

we do hope to be able to produce
some in time. If anyone is really
interested, Laurel and her friends
included, we are holding another

New Age Seminar in Kitimat on
Nov. 15 at 7 p.m., and Nov. 16-at
9 a.m. at the Riverlodge Commu-
nity Centre,

Canada, like it or not, is truly a
pluralistic country, Canadian soci-
ety is a society in which individu-
als from diverse ethnic, racial,
religious and social groups may
freely maintain autonomous par-
ticipation in, and development of,
their traditional culture or special
interests within our common civi-
lization. We value this freedom
and defend it, and the sad reality
is, we will yet need to defend it.

This is the freedom that enables
Laurel to believe what she
believes and practice what she
practices. Many of my personal
beliefs and the teachings of the
Bible are diametrically opposed to
Laurel's, but remember, it is that
same freedom that enables me to
practice Biblical Christianity or
any other petson to pursue their

Way I See It" and a blank space
makes him look bad—re-
member the "editor’s fault” rule.
Which is why I’m allowed to
pat Mike on the back in print,
and let him know that some-
body’s noticed his efforts. This
follows my own rule: it never

_ hurts to flatter the boss.

Besides, there were no cookies
in the office today.

Ch ri sti ans _—_— Continued from page 7—

beliefs. God himself gives man the
freedom tho choose whom he will
serve and he allows us to reap the
consequences of our choices.
Some who do as Peter did on the
night Jesus gave His life for us,
and strike out to harm those who
came to take Him. After Peter had
lopped off the ear of one of them
(he wasn’t aiming for his ear),
Jesus touched the man and healed
him and then rebuked Peter say-
ing, “All those who take the sword
will die by the sword.” True
Christianity, Bible-based Chris-
tianity, forbids such violent
actions, We are to be “‘wise as ser-
pents and harmless as doves.”
Matt 10:16.

Does that mean we Christians sit

silently in our ivory towers, while

the world staggers and reels under
the weight of corruption, crime,
injustice, violence, perversions,
greed, the disintegration of the
family, broken homes and, might I
say, a phenomenal upsurge of
demonic activity promoted
through elements of the music
industry, Hollywood, and the most
prolific barrage of Occult litera-
ture in the history of the world?
No, not in the least. Fortunately,
we also live in a country that

art

stands for the right to freedom of
speech, where groups and individ-
vals can express their viewpoints
and concerns in myriad ways
about any number of potentially
destructive activities and influ-
ences that may be pressing upon
our society.

As Christians we too are very —

much aware of the spirit world but
we view it quite differently than
Laurel and others who practice
various metaphysical crafts, The
bible clearly warns us that there
are spirits who go about to seduce
and delude people and who have

their own doctrines and teachings.

(I Tim 4:1) It also tells us that
these spirits masquerade as angels
of light. (I Cor 11:14) These spirit
beings also are capable of per-
forming “all kinds of counterfeit
miracles, signs and wonders”.

The bible actually talks a lot
about channeling spirits, in fact,
there are over 20 references to it in
the Bible, every one strictly for-
bidding it. Why? Because the
Bible identifies the spirits who
communicate through channeling
as the one’s we know as evil or
demonic,

As christians we oppose the spir-
its behind these activities, but we
must love and treat with respect
the people involved with them.

Pastor Mike Rosenau,
Terrace Christian Fellowship.

Fe