vet

SARAH ZIMMERMAN

SKEENA ANGLER

ROB BROWN
Snore wars

ou could try these,” he reached
under the counter, fumbled
i around and brought up a small,
green plastic container the dia-
meter of a film canister.

“They got a chain so ya can clip it ta your
suspenders, or a buttonhale...see.” He shook the
container. The chain rattled almost imperceptib-
ly, against the plastic.

“Do they work?” I said.

“Well, it depends what ya want ‘em for.
Chainsaw?”

“No, Snoring.”

He heard the desperation in my voice then
leaned forward against the counter,

“Gedz, tell me about it. [ went on this moose-

hunting trip. My partner snored so bad I tore the
filters off my smokes and shoved ‘em in my
ears.”
‘I settled for the cheapest plugs; They made a
gentle phAfft as they expanded after they were
squeezed into a tight little ball then shoved in
the ear. They looked like cigarette butts.

The day was clear and warm but the fuzz in my woozy,
sleep-deprived head blanketed it in fog. 1 picked my way
through the potholes and mud patches to Bernie's truck. This
was part of the problem: it was Bernie’s truck and Bernie's
camper. In fact, the whole trip was Bernies’s idea. When
you're riding in someone else’s truck, and you've only paid for
half the beer, you're not allowed to piss and moan about little
things. It’s a rule. After three sleepless nights and no opportunity
10 nap, I was ready to violate that rule. 1 did start to complain
once, :
“You snore,” [said tersely,

“Oh B.S.,” said Bernie. And no more discussion was pos-

able -Beraie pulled oul. -

.. “Find what you were after?”

“Uh huh, Aspirins.” It was’t a lie, I’d bought a tin for my
‘throbbing head.

“You'll love this next lake. Loaded with trout. We only have
to pack the cance a mile.”

“Onty a mile.”

“Yeah. Great eh?”

Bernie wis always chipper, slap-ya-on-the-back-ha-ha-ha
chipper. That was because he always had a good nights sleep.

Bernie: ‘parked the truck at Black Gnat Pass campsite. We
packed the boat ard the rods and the vests and the lunches and
the beer th the lake, It felt like twenty miles - hard miles thanks
to the mosquitoes and blackflies wandering in and out aur ears,
noses, and throats.

We fshed Bernie cast. I flailed. Ducks paddled. Loons did
loony things, A bear stumbled out of the bush into the water. A
moose did the same. Eagles chased ospreys. Ospreys chased
eagles. Bernie laughed and laughed and laughed. It was like
the dream | hadn't had for the last three days.

When Bernie announced we could leave the boat and most
of the gear ovemight I thanked God. That night we ate beans
and assisted hamburgers, and drank six beer apiece. Bemie ce-
clared it was time to tum in. As he crawled into the sumptuous
upper bunk, | arranged the hide-a-seat and tried to get comfort-
able on the crack between the two cushions. Bernie switched
on his booktape. It helps him nod off. It’s like having your mo-

. ther read you to sleep he likes to say.

“Freaky Deaky by Elmore Leonard, Read by Darren
McGavin,” said the announcer on the tape,

Darren started in: “The body on the bottom of Wanda's
swimming podl...

“AHHRRRRRR 2222.,. AHHHRRR zzz." Bernie was
asleep. I was awake, left (o listen to the first half of Freaky
Deaky once again, then lie there wondering haw it might end,

Melvyn Switzer holds the world’s record, snoring al an ¢ar-
popping 91 decibels. That's 26 db over what the Workman's
Compensaion Board allows. Bul Melvyn's a lightweight com-
pared to Bemie, Bernie sounds like a rutting sea lion trying to
mate witha jack hammer in a sewer culvert, My wool pants
hung beside me. | reached in the pockets for my newly ac-
quired plugs.

“AHHRRARRRR 2722...”

“Tf you're gonna shoot, Do it, Bang!"

"PHHFFFIT.. -PHHFFFT"

"ahhertr 2272...

“Thump. pete Marton hil the floor...”
. Even witht cigarette butts in my aural cavities it was too [oud to
sleep. In desperation { grabbed my sleeping bag ard spilled out of the
camper. I sombambulated to the cab of the truck, crawled in, curled
up around the stick shifl. I couldn't hear the tape anymore. But even
through a bafflé of steel and chrome and aluminum, I could sili faint-
ly hear Bernie; Magically, sleep started to slowly creep over me,

The windowsl-I awoke with a start. It dawned on me that the cab
was airtight making asphyxiation a certainty, I called bath windows
down a crack and curled around the stick once more, Ahhh...

"Brzzz"

Black Gniat Piss, Soon the cab was vibrating with no-see-ums and
see-ums, biting and clawing and fighting an over-the-top-rope battle
royal for my blood, I fled the cab and entered the din once more. With
shafts morning light pouring through the window, I fell into a dream
state vaguely reminiscent of sleep. It lasted for a short period.

“Hey,” yelled Bernie, “you gonna sleep forever?”

Tocure snoring, otolaryngolagists often recommend surgery an de-
viant seplum's, unruly uvulas ot tired turbinates, Thal morning, after
four sleeps nigh, I contemplated a headeclomy on Bernie with
my Buck Kale.

*etake me hae; Teaid,

"What's the matter? Don't you like the outdoors?" asked Bernie
He tocked hurt. °

Hoop rivalry
revived with

annual tourney

THE 6th ANNUAI. Ker-
mode Classic basketball!
tournament al Caledonia
Senior Secondary School
is set to po this coming
weekend.

The action is set to
‘begin Friday, December
8th at the Caledonia gym
at 2 p.m. with the Ker-
modes taking on the DP.
Todd Trojans at 8 pm. The
tournament final will begin
at 7:30 pm on Saturday.

Visiting teams include
the Trojans from Prince
George, Kitimat’s Mount
Elizabeth Eagles, the
Charles Hays Hurricanes
from Prince Rupert and the
Hazelton Spartans.

The tournament sets the
stage for exciting action
between rival senior boys
teams, the Rainmakers
from Prince Rupert and the
hometown Kermodes. The
Rainmakers are currently
ranked 2nd in the provin-
cial AA polls after finish-
ing 4th at provincials last
year.

The Kermodes are hop-
ing to improve on their im-
pressive 91h place standing
in last year’s AAA provin-
cial championships.

The beginning of bas-
ketball season is certainly
a time of transition for
most teams and the same
holds true for the Ker-
modes.

During exhibition play
in Prince Rupert, last, week
the Kermodes came out.on
top defeating the Charles

en
weg lg

638-7283

CAL'S SENIOR boys basketball team practices for
the upcoming Kermode Classic basketball tourna-

ment to be held December 8 and 9. Tournament
passes are $5.00 for adults and $2.00 for students.

Hays Hurricanes 78-38.

Rick Dhaliwal led the
team with 18 points fol-
lowed by Jason Klein and
Doug Burnip each with 15
points. Other top point
scorers were Brian Mat-
thews, a Skeena Jr. player
with 13 points, and Sean
Dusdal with 10 points.

In their second exhibi-
tion game, however, the
Kermodes played hard but
came up short with an 84-

68 score against the Rain-
makers.

According to Caledonia
coach Cam MacKay the
Kermodes and the Rain-
makers are long-lime ri-
vals.

“Is there a rivalry be- .

tween the two schools?”
asks MacKay. “You bet! It
is a greal one now!”

. During the off season
the players play on the
same team lo represent the

Northwest region says
MacKay. The relationship
between the two teams
used to be very bitter be-
cause the coaches and
players rarely worked to-
gether.

Playing together in the
aff season has added to the
competition and rivalry
-between the two schools
‘and has taken away from
‘the negative overtones of
years gone by, he said.

The rivalry continues
this year with the promise
of some exciting match
ups between the two
teams.

Last year saw the Ker-
modes sitting at an im-
pressive 4-1 record against
the Rainmakers. On the
tail of last week’s loss to
the Rainmakers the Cale-
donia boys are looking for-
ward to a rematch ai the
Kermode Classic this
week-end.

Spirit Riders undefeated at All Native qualfiier

By SARAH A. ZIMMERMAN

That left New Aiyansh and Gitwinksihlkw

going undefeated throughout tournament play.

LAST WEEKEND'S All Native Basketball
Qualifying Tournament in Prince Rupert was
taken by storm by Terrace and area teams.

Early in the tournament Prince Rupert’s
men’s masters team suffered a humiliating de-
feat at the hands of New Aiyansh with a score
of 101-51. ,

Later in the weekend it was Gitwink-
sihlkw’s turn to to come out on top against
Prince Rupert winning by a slim margin of
three points (64-61), but effectively elimina-
ting the home team from qualifying in the All
Native Basketball Tournament to be held in

to battle it out for lop honours. New Aiyansh
won wilh a score of 83-75 in the finals.

The first and second place teams qualify for
ihe tournament in February, so both teams will
move on.

The Terrace men’s intermediate team auto-
matically advanced to February’s tournament
as only two teams were entered at that level in
the qualifying tournament.

First place honours in the women’s division
were taken by Terrace’s powerhouse team,
The Spirit Riders, trouncing Ahousat by a
score of 68-35.

Spirit Riders’ forward Yvonne Campbell won
the tournament MVP.

The team has only been playing together for
ten months but they have really come together
well and will be a force to be reckoned with in
February’s All Native.

“We went down to Rupert with the purpose
to win,” says team member Toni Nisyok.

“We wanted to go to the All Native Bas-
ketbali Tournament and as a new team we are
hungry.”

The women are now preparing for for the
upcoming Christmas Classic in Prince Rupert

According to the Guinness Book a British cabbie named’

February.

The Spirit Riders dominated the ANBOT

Curlers sweep
Kitimat bonspiel

Contributed

THE HOST TEAMS
proved just a little loo
generous at last week-
end’s Hirsch Creek Ladies’
Open Bonspiel in Kitimat,
allowing Terrace curlers to
take home all three titles.

The Terracites got the
upper hand early, fallow-
ing a single in the first end
with steals of one in each
of the next three. Mulder
broke through in the fifth,
cutting Terrace’s lead to 4-
2, but that was as close as
they would get.

Apolezer’s crew struck
back immediately with a
three, then put the game
away with steals of two
and one to persuade Mul-

der to shake hands after

eight.

The 10-2 margin for
skip Apolczer, third Linda
Kawinsky, second Lynn
Tyron and lead Mary Rau-
ter was the widest of the
three finals.

In B Event’s all-Terrace
showdown, Marnie Mal-
thews got the early jump
with singles in each of the
first two ends, but Linda
Montlure evened it up in
the third. Matthews edged
back ahead in the next,
then broke the game open
with a steal of three in the
fifth.

Monture couldn’t, con-

jure up a comeback this
time as the teams ex-
changed singles aver the
next four ends. Matthews,
third Marge Skead, second
Denise Sawtell and lead
Edie Nahulak ran their op-
ponents out of racks in the
lenth to walk off 8-4 vic-
tors.

It was left to the A
Event contenders to pro-
duce the drama and Terra-
ciles Heather Joseph and
Kim MacDougall - 1999
and 1998 event winners re-
spectively - did just that.

Deadlocked at five after
six, MacDougall. stole one
for the lead when Joseph
overthrew her hammer
draw attempt.

However, with Mac-
Dougall's rink temporarily
losing their touch in the
eighth, their opponents
took advantage ‘to. start
building an end. By the
time Joseph came to throw
her first, she was. lying
three, mo

Although coming In a
bit deeper than she would
have liked, Joseph made
in four. That left MacDou-
pall to go for the freeze on
her last, but she came up
just ‘a tauch too slrong,
bumping the blue rock and
rolling to be counter but
wide open.

Although missing ° ihe

to be held December 28, 29 and 30th.

TERRACE CURLING rink consisting of Kim MacDougall, third Joan Kuchary-
shen, second Jacquie Eves and lead Sylvia Griffith won A event at Kitimat's
Hirsch Creek Ladies Open Bonspiel.

nose hit she wanted, Jo-
seph gat a piece of the red
and settled for four and a
9-6 lead.
“ -Joseph’s front end. got
the pressiire on right away
in the ninth, removing the
danger of a big end. reply
and-even pushing Mac-
Dougall to: prevent what
would -have -been a back+
breaking steal.

Counting one coming to

throw her last, Joseph was |

heavy, blowing the guard
allempt and leaving Mac-
Dougall an open target

which she did. not. miss.-

But two up going home

with the hammer, Joseph .

was siill i in the driving seat

to repeat,

By the time it came
down to third racks, Joseph
was lying ane wilh Mac-
Dougall at second shot.

_ Alternating taps saw: the

count swing ‘belween one
blue: and two. feds; - but
MacDougall got her open-
ing: when Joseph’s third

came up light on her Last.

She took full’ advant-

- ape, executing. a perfect

tap anid roll-to lic a:poten-
tial game-winning three.
“Faced. with a-couple of
options, Joseph: went for
the kill with:a double on’
the. open tocks, but only
managed lo. remove: one.

MacDougall replied with

another hit and roll to re-
store the three,

That left Joseph having
to draw in and cut out al
least one. red to force the
extra end, two for the
game.

It was not to be: she
came out- wide forcing the
sweepers to stay off the
rock because of line while
at the same time | pre
it lose the momé@Hiin it
would need to reach the
house.

~The steal of three gave

‘top honours lo MacDau-

gall, third Joan Kuchary-
shen, second Jacquie Eves
and. lead Sylvia Griffith,
10-9." >