if ao iene ey ‘Honesty Is Best - Abby If You're Old Enough ToTakelt = By Abigail Van Buren © 1980 by Universal Press Syndicate. DEAR ABBY: Some years ago, I ‘wae raped and became pregnant. I gave birth to a baby boy, but under the | : circumstances [ couldn't bring myself to raise him. My best friend — I’l] call her Minnie — was happily married but - waan’t able to bear children, ao ashe and her husband adopted my son. That decision worked out well for all of us. I visited them often and watched the boy grow up in a fine environment. . ' Here's my problem: In Minnie's eyea, the boy is now old enough to understand the circumatances of his birth, adoption, etc, and they want to tell him the entire story. They think he has the right to know all the facts of hie birth, including the fact that I am his mother and hia father was a rapist! . I have always felt that honesty is the best policy, but in . this instance, I don’t think the boy needs to know all the facts, Because ofthis disagreement, I am no longer speaking to Minnie and her husband. ; : 1 would like your opinion. ; _ , WAITING IN SARATOGA e . DEAR WAITING: Honesty is always the best policy. You don’t say how old the boy is, but he should be told \ + ‘only as much as he can comprehend. Very young children can understand “adoption,” but the other details of his birth should not be disclosed until he is sufficiently mature to handle them. (P.S. I question the wisdom of telling a child his father was a rapist.) DEAR ABBY: I am married to a physician. We recently attended a medical convention where there were about 3,000 . physicians present. ’ Maybe it’s because lately we have all become ao weight conscious, but I was really shocked by the number of fat . physiciana I saw there. More than half the doctore were visibly overweight (my formerly svelte hushand included). Have you any statiatica dealing with physicians being © overweight? JOHN'S WIFE. DEAR WIFE: In a survey of 900 family physicians, sponsored by the American Academy of Family Physicians, 62 percent of the M.D.a wha responded said they wanted to lose weight. More than one-third of that group wanted to lose more than 10 pounds, but 89 percent said they had not followed a specific weight-loss diet in the last six monthe. - (P.S. Two-thirds recognized the necessity of con- trolling their sugar and cholesterol intake, but only a little more than 50“percent said they themselves followed that advice.) Physician, heal thyself? DEAR ABBY: Melvin graduated from high school at the top of his claes last June. He waa offered a acholarship to a very fine university, but he turned it down to go to a local college. Everybody thought he was crazy. He admitted to me he didn't want .to go away to college because he gets “homesick.” ’ ; We sent Melvin to summer camp when he was 11, and he came back after one week so thin and pale he didn’t lock like the same boy. He said he got so homesick he couldn't even sleep or eat. Melvin is not an only child. But he is my youngest and haa always stayed very close tome. ‘ He doean't have many friends and has never asked a gitt for a date on his own, but he has dated girls when someone fixes him up. He reads a lot and doesn't mind being by himeelf-all the time. I want Melvin to go away to college this fall, but every time I bring it up he begs me not to talk about it. I think it would be good for him to go away, but how can a mother _push her son out of the house when he begs to stay? MELVIN'S MOM DEAR MOM; It's not uncommon for an 11-year-old to be homesick, but when he reaches college age he should have matured sufficiently to overcome it. If Melvin has not been evaluated by an expert, he, should be. Don't push him out of the house, but do insist he have a frank talk with a doctor. a ~ Your Individual - “Horoscope _ .FGORFRIDAY, - SUNE 6, 1980 ARIES 7 ve a a (Mar. 21 to Apr. 19) Vé ° You may fee] unappreciated at work. You're overly sensitive now. Use time ‘by yourself for new inspirations about Investment projects... ° TAUR tee - - (Apr. 20 to May 20) O4eg? Partnership rapport, ‘but friends are touchy and easily’ . ,offended. You may tire quickly of the soctal scene.’ Enjoy privacy, GEMINI ... ; (May 21 to June 20) < _ Anew work assignment. | _ Take this chance to show-your -. originality. However, keep ‘personality out of business . dealings for success, CANCER 7 ‘(June 21 to July 22) ec ‘It may be difficult to ¢ concentrate on work. Avold - - daydreaming. Anew romantic | introduction, but inwardly © you're feeling withdrawn... LEO. - (July 23 to Aug. CESS In romance keep your feet on the ground. You tend towards wishful thinking. A ‘close ally has an interesting business suggestion. , (Aug, 23 to Sept, 22) MP My Doing something different together will please a romantic interest. How about . a short trip? The p.m. doesn’t favor social life, LIBRA | (Sept. 23 to Oct. 29) SB . Problems.at work may be — the catalyst you need to come up with a new mone idea, On the job, the atmosphere is touchy. SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to Nov. 21) "LAKE You may take up a new hobby. Don't be afraid to try new things. Romantic interests need special GITT. Rory ee Hint (Nov. 22 to Dee. ay ge? Find ways to titilize wasted space at home. However, you may not be In the mood ta do anything too costly. A relative may be moody. ’ CAPRICORN i (Dec, 22 to Jan. 10 Wo ke’ Watch for crossed-signals re travel. Meet new friends with cordiality. Don’t brood about a work problem, The p.m, finds you domestically inclined. AQUARIU: (Jan. 20 to Feb, 18} are Neither a borrower nor lender be.:A new career opening is financially promising. Still, you're warned not to overspend for pleasure. PISCES (Feb. 19 to Mar. 20) MEX An element of deception ~ possible. See . things realistically. Fire up your spirit with travel plans. ‘Romance iffy in the p.m. HERMAN "He's put dravy in his water. pistol.” . aoa ot ACROSS 42. Obstacle DOWN ‘LActor Torn 44 Fidgeted 1 Seance 4 Wet - §@Followeda sound 16 Conger ' § Mine cookbook 12 Maugham's 60 Caviar and— | S2Teacher’s socks ©. Morse 130n the briny favorite 5 Cleopatra’ code term 1M Mother of ..58 Dutch undoing ©. 27 Numbers ‘Apollo cheese 6 Stingy- (abbr.) 15 Broadway 57 English . - ,, Mualcal rive liTrim - _ $8 First lady ‘.18.Ballpoint 59 Buddies salad features dressing 61Sunbather’s ‘How 35 Brit. alr atm 21 Like some goal Sweet!” 3%Glum -- "canned Avg: solution time: 28min, 40 Imprecations orem aang cman be hed 5 TIMP REAIDIEINEOIKIR : my LR CIOLIOIRILIEIS:S _ Before . 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DERPK RDPKJH G NEKI TEBW EN HBDPKJ Yesterday's Cryptoquip — ERRATIC CROWDS WORRIED MUSEUM CURATOR. | —_ , Today's Cryptoquip clue: G equals A The Cryptoquip is a simple substitution cipher in which each letter used stands for another. If you think that X equals 0, it — will equal O throughout the puzzle. Single letters, short words, and words using an apostrophe can give you clues to locating vowels, Solution is acconiplished by trial and error. By Stan Lee and John Romita * CATFISH A ! .| PETER, I MUST . Y GAIDER CAROLE, LOOM AY ME!) HOW CAN 1? \évlie You Pon'r \ xever YA KNOW WHAT YOU'RE |: *? T LEFT IT | | you AAOM HOW TS / YOU ACT E ENOUGH } WA MONG Howe Me rh) CHAIR! FEEL ABOUT YOU! ee es CONROE, A ote _ wert : MYSTERIOUS! i : = 55 T fl is) Y NS Shy WY Bel pi A . 4 3 a { } 5 ~ oy = = t u — yp q A, ° A ; q ( te 3 pe f cA : =e ANE N 7) sited |F) z : Oral: Flin.“ | : By Roger Bollen and Gary Peterman LF Tus is suppose TO BE BEAN SOUP. HOW COME = CONT FIND ONE SINGLE BEAN IN My BowLP { A THOUSANE TCAN‘T TELL... RE WRITING 'S mh [ West To i, FEED WE RSENS! ICAUSE IT'S STL (© 1000 by Chicago Tribune AY. News Sync. inc. a h Jills ®eld Eotenprises, tre;, 1080 . _ WHY DO T VOLUNTEER FOR THESE CRUMMY DETAILS....... 1X a: 1; | ’ _ DOONESBURY By Garry Trudeau : -_ a te . . . aur youstit. ALIN THE STUDENTS HAVE BEEN Tot MbeeNe Ne TD BY THE WAM HMSELP a ENT AD aXe ee | EY ARE TD ANGUER THE! TY Oe || THE ELL BEING OF THE HOS- zi M4 || TAGES 15 COMPLETELY IN Aty eee. A ! i. P Fc es THD