6 Riverboat Days guide

The pun and only TRUE history of the

by Diana English

This story was written for a
Toastmasters’ Tall Tale Contest,
an annual event wherein speech-
makers from Terrace, Kitimat, and
Prince Rupert Toastmasters’ Clubs
gather to compete —AND impress
one another with their wit and
wisdom, or ability to tell out-and-
out lies. This story won that con-
test in 1990.

Toastmasters International is an
organization devoted to helping
men and women develop the arts
of speaking, listening and thinking,
to ‘acquire greater communication
and leadership skills,

The history of this area as we are
taught in school, and read in local
history books is wrong. These are
myths that have been perpetrated
throughout the years. Here, you
will see the one and only true
history of British Columbia's
Pacific Northwest from Hazeiton
to Prince Rupert, from Stewart to
Kitimat.

Many, many years ago, a giant
named George decided to leave his
home in the east and move west,
where there was lots of room for a
very large person like him to move:
around, So, George left his family
of many brothers, sisters and
cousins who affectionately called
him “Little” in -jest of his large
size, and he started across the
country. All he took with him were

the clothes on his back, the tools
of his trade and a large number of
his pet dogs.

George "Little" finally arrived
near the west coast and came
across what was to a giant man
like him a skinny river. This, he
promptly named Skinny River,
and so it is called to this very day.

Many people of this area believe
George "Little" was a logger, but
actually he was a gardener. and
landscape artist. He found a moun-
tain on which to build his new
home, but the terrain was too
rugged and forested for casy
access from the river. He hauled
his giant-sized tools from his pack
and proceeded to clear away trees

and carve steps from the river to ~

his mountain. When George sur-
veyed his completed handiwork, he
was satisfied with the Terrace he
had built and he sent for his family
-of brothers, sisters and cousins to
' join him. That area is called Ter-
race, to this very day. _ What
many people do not know is that
- most of the places around the area
aye named after’ members of
George’s family or named in re-
membrance of their acts while they
were here. ©

. Take, for instance, George’s
cousin, Al, who was the first rela-
tive to arrive. Al Cann moved
here with his wife and son
Douglas and numerous pet cats.
Things were great when they first
- arrived, but soon there were ter-
rible ‘fights between Al’s cats and
George’s dogs, so Al decided to
move a little further south, nearer
the ocean. When he found a place
he liked, he named it after his
favourite kitly, Matt. And that
town is called Kitty Matt to this
very day.

- But George’s and Al’s pets con-
liriued to fight. Al’s cats would run
away. to Terrace and scratch

George’s poor dogs half to death.
As a last resort, George planted
thorns on some of the hills near
Terrace to keep the cats away and
protect his dogs. Unusually large
numbers of dogs roam around the
area we call Thorn Hill to this
very day.

Al Cann’s son Douglas absolute-
ly hated living in Kitty Matt. In
fact, he hated itso much Douglas
Channeled all his energies into
getting out by ocean routes. He did
eventually succeed and the route
he used is called Douglas Channel,
in his memory, to this very day.

Al Cann’s daughter was the next
relative to move to this area. She
was married to a man named John
Slake and had a young son named
Calvin.. When they first moved
here, they spent some time with
George in Terrace, then headed
south to be with Al. On their jour-
ney, their young son succumbed to
a terrible illness. They buried him
on the spot where he died, right by

the waters between the two towns.
A monument was erecied in his

A special supplement to the Terrace Review and Prince Rupert This Week
oy

honour, and stands beside the lake
where they lay Cal Slake, to this
very day. |

One year, Al Cann found Kitty S
Matt was too boring for him. So
he bought a boat, found a young
navigator and set off up the Kalum
River in search of the lost Nishga
city of Grease. One day, when the
navigator saw a collection of
thatched huts on the river bank, his -
immortal words were "Oh, look
Mr. Cann, yon City is not made
of grease, but is a Green Ville and
I an sure there are natives living
there." Hence, we have Canyon
City, Greenville and Aiyansh, to
this very day.

George’s youngest brother. Ross,
moved out here next, Ross was a
real womanizer, drinking and car-
ousing his way to a bad reputation
in Terrace. George finally, for
Ross's own good, sent him north.
Ross settled in a valley north of
Terrace, but his reputation con- .
tinued to grow. It appeared Ross
would make an ass of himself no

cont’d pg 18

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IS THIS HOW KITSELAS CANYON REALLY GOT ITS NAME?
Read The pun and only history of the northwest to find out more.

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