INSIDE COMMUNITY EVENTS B2 JUST A THOUGHT EV BISHOP Grieved I USUALLY don’t have a problem wri- ting ‘something positive in my column. Although I see a lot of bad things in the world, [ also see a lot of good, Sometimes, though, my optimism is so severely wounded that it cringes, failing me, when confronted ance again by the hideous things that people will do to other people. A friend called me early that Tuesday morning to ask me if I had heard the terrible news, My husband had just turned on the radio and was yelling something from the bedroom. “Planes took out the towers?” 1 repeated. “No, it wasn’t terrorism... wasn't it just an accident?” My brain reftesed to get it. I finally understood, an hour later, that it wasn’t morning was normal. I got to take my kids and husband to school and work, and | would get to see them again. I cried because [ know how frazzled mornings can be and thal so many of those victims’ last words to their loved ones were probably something like, “Hurry up, We've gatta go, NOW.” Most of all, I cried because of a question. Not “why” it had to happen, I under- stand or at least glimpse some of the motiva- tions people have to hurt each other. But how? That’s my question. How do you, no matter how passionate your hatred, no matter how justified you feel in your point of view, no conviction... How do you let the evil within you win and hurt, maim and kill thousands of innocents in the name of anything? How do youbecome convinced that it’s the right thing to do? I have thought long and hard about this at other times. The attack in the U.S. is not the first, or sadly the last, time the horrar of terror- ism or war will make me cry... and WHERE it happens doesn’t alleviate my abhorrence and sadness about it. Although equally heinous, the U.S. attack is a tad scarier to me personally then an attack elsewhere because it removes the fantasy that doesn’t happen here. [ have wondered; could I kill for what I believe or for my children? 1 have always come to the con- clusion, no. I could want to, definitely. f could {maybe... I hope) be brave enough to die for those I love or for what I believe in... but could I kill in cold blood? Even the guilty? I don't think so. ‘How do you let the evil within you win?’ Regardless of what I feel 1 could or cauld not do, other people obviously don’t have my qualms. It’s hard to describe, even slightly, the depths of why and how this event bothers me. ] saw TV news footage of some people cheering and celebrating the event. Who they are, where they're from, doesn’t matter. I'm sure that they are a minority and their misplaced joy doesn't represent any group of people as a whole. I’m bothered that the display was even aired because of its ability to incite anger, hurt and prejudice. [n our continent we have at times been indifferent, unmoved by the tart- uous turmoil in other places and isn’t that al- most the same thing? A silent celebration that the pain is “there” not “here”. My grief for people doesn’t end or begin in any country. I have cried over events that have {taken place in all parts of the world, past and present... For the people. The moms and dads and babies that struggle to survive in the world ’ and lose their lives for other peoples’ politics, for politics that mean nothing to peoples’ real lives. People don’t deserve tragedy just be- cause of the fluke of where they’re born and raised... It’s not right for the innocent to pay for the sins (imagined or real) of the country they call home. I find it a bitter irony that the Monday night before this all happened 1] had a conversation with a friend about kindness and how it was an endangered quality in our world and in our society. 1 brought up a song that I liked that has this line in its refrain, “In the end, only kindness matters.” I don’t believe that kind- ness is the only thing that matters in the end... - but it matters a lot. There is almost nothing I can do in this world to make it a better place except to pray, to try to be kind and to teach my children the same. -T have articulated, not even well, just the barest edge of the thoughts that have assailed me since that Tuesday. There is far more to be said but it won't be. by me today. [can’t help but wonder; someday when: the people re- sponsible for this terrorism look back, will they see that kindness should have. matteted? ! hope so. I hope one day we.all do. a freak accident.I cried. I cried because my - matter how strongly you feel some twisted - By JENNIFER LANG SIGNING UP as.a victim support worker takes a special kind of person. Someone like Trish Connaugh- ton, a woman who realizes she’s probably the last person you"ll ‘want to meet, because it means something terrible has happened. But shell be there if you need her, just the same, _ . Now entering her third year as a volunteer with the Terrace and District Victims Assistance Pro- gram, the 38-year-old admits her job is nat for everybody, -She’s helped families cope with sudden deaths, tracked down shoes for accident victims lying in hospital, and she’s even atiended the funerals of strangers. TVAP is a police-based pro- gram offering immediate emotian- al support, information and refer- rals, to victims of crime 24-hours a day. “Tt’s a real big challenge,” she says. “It’s not like volunteering al Girl Guides.” But TVAP volunteers do take a page out of the Girl Guides’ hand- book: They’re prepared. They receive at least 40 hours of training before their first as- Signment and are always paired with a shift supervisor when dis- patched to a call. Still, she never knows what she’ll be dealing with when she. arrives at the hospital ar some- one’s home. “As I'm heading into town, I’ve got maybe 15 minutes to prepare,” she says. She has a fa- A call to action for more © Big Brothers and Sisters IT’S CALLED A Little Walk for a Big Cause. On Sunday, Sept. 30, local children who are on a waiting list for Terrace’s Big Brothers and Big Sisters program will hit the Grand Trunk Pathway with signs and banners. Their signs will ask a pointed question: When will 1 get a Big TERRACE STANDARD. OMMUNI h gher calling The Terrace Standard, Wednesday, September 26, 2001 - 81 SECTION B JENNIFER LANG 638-7283 READY: Const. Bob Lang briefs victim support worker Trish Con- oe naughton as the pair get ready to enter Mills Memorial Hospital, vourite ritual. “Tsay my little prayer and ask God to help me,” she says. “Some of it is just good, deep’ breathing as [’m driving.” Her clients are referred to her by RCMP attending accident scenes, assaults, break-ins, or making next of kin notifications in Sister,” she said. Brother or Sister? The walk is a way of hightighting the need for more adult volunteers the needs, says executive dir- ector Lois Doehler. “Some of these kids have been she said. waiting a year, two program so desperately years, for a Big Brother or Sister.” If you’ve ever thought about becoming a Big Brother or Big Sister, now is the time to act. The Terrace program, now in its 10th year, is still struggling to match the long waiting list of children with an adult “big” brother or sister. Doehler says there are currently about is provided, For more information on how you can become a Big Brother or Big Sister, call Lois at 635-4232. The walk takes place at 1 p.m. and meets al the railway car on the Grand Trunk Pathway in Terrace, Pledge forms are available at Misty River Books. case of sudden deaths. She may make phone calls or a pot of tea, but mostly she listens. “We're not counsellors. We're support workers. The majority of what we do is listen and have em- pathy. Because we're a_ third party, we're very neutral.” She sees TVAP and the RCMP as a team working hand in hand. “We can stay and be the shoulder they need to cry on,” Connaughton usually checks on her clients the next morning. From there, she may refer clients to a variety of other communily agen- cies, from crisis lines toa counsel- ling, or accompany them to court before closing the file. Connaughton also coordinates TVAP’s Safer Homes Program, offering suggestions to people on how to make their homes safer and more secure. Surprisingly, she finds next of. kin notifications the most reward- ing. She feels privileged to share part of their journey of grief. It's a road she’s been down herself; her mother died when she was 13, She later lost five family mem- bers, including her father, in one terrible year, piunging her into a cycle of despair. She got her life back on track, but it tock her a decade to muster the coyrage to join TVAP after first seeing a display in the mall, She finally realized, at age 34, she had a lifetime of experience to share with others in crisis in a meaningful way. Volunteering for TVAP, she says, has given her back more than she ever realized. It’s even changed her career path; she’s a college student and plaus to complete a degree in so- cial work. Note: TVAP is holding an orien- tation meeting Oct. 10 at the RCMP detachment at 7 pan. 20 children on the program’s wait list. The purpose of Sunday's walk is to raise funds for the program ~ and raise awareness aboul the need for more Big Brothers and Sisters to come forward, “Some of these kids have been waiting a year, two years, for a Big Brother or The time commitment — an hour or twe a week ~ is less important than consistency, The ideal candidate is “just someone who has a few hours and who would like to spend time with a kid. It’s a very simple concept.” Training and ongoing support Around Town fe LOST NO MORE: “Spider” has a new home. @ Making a difference FOUR FRIENDS tink arms as they join their school’s Terry Fox Run. Students - and many staff members — at Thornhill Junior Secondary School took part In the event, held Friday morning. The rainy but invi- gorating run was the final event in a week of activities organized by the school’s leadership class to raise awareness and money for the Terry Fox. Foundation. Last year, Terry Fox Runs in Canada and around the world raised $21.7 million. In our country, the money is spent on can- . ger research grants distributed by the Cancer Institute of Canada. Puppy adopted AN abandoned puppy who was found wandering around Terrace suffering from extensive injuries back in August has now found a loving home. The Doberman puppy her rescuers called “Pretty Lady” has been adopted by some Kitimat residents several weeks after receiving free treat- ment for her injuries - and physiotherapy to help her recuperate. In doing so, the Recse-Hansens have given her a new name, and a new lease on life. She’s been re-named Spider, says Morgan Reese-Hansen, and she’s slowly recovering from her injuries. Wanted: Baaad bosses DOES YOUR boss bring the office bowling aver- age down or eat all the cookies in the staff fridge? Then the Kidney Foundation of Canada’s B.C. branch wants to know, It’s looking to rope in some local bosses and community leaders to assist the annual Round Up for Research. The Western-themed event involves a roving posse of sheriffs and deputics who arrest bosses and other “Top Guns” for their crimes, drag them over to the Skeena Mall, and make them pay through a particularly swift brand of old-fashioned justice. The bosses are forced to spend an hour raising money for the Kidney Foundation as bail. The money raised at the Round Up, scheduled for Oct, 10 and 11, goes to support research on kid- ney disease, and assists patients through services and supporl programs like the organ donor aware- ness program. To make an arrest, call Marianne at: 635-2942,