INSIDE COMMUNITY EVENTS B2 CHARLYNN TOEWS. For cats only F THERE were a magazine by cats . and for cats, it would go like this. Rate Your Human! Take this quiz. We cats have our preferences in humans — 4° well-trained, obedient, manipulable, compliant human is, of course, the best. Take the quiz be- low to sce how your person stacks up, Circle’ your chosen answer, and keep score as you go. 1. When I meow at the door to be let out- side, my human: a) jumps to the door instantly and opens it immediately (+1 point); b) shouts at me, ‘‘You are a cat!”’ and then rudely ignores me until I slink away (-1 point); c) I never need to meow at the door because my person intuitively knows when I want to go out, and opens the door for me before I think of it (+10 points). 2. I can lie on my human’s Jap: a) for a little while with good chin scratch- ing (+1 point); b) hardly ever and only when she feels like it and only for a little while (-1 point); c) forever and ever and ever and he will never ever go to work again or leave this couch in any way for any reason (+10 points). 3. When I am hungry, my human: a) feeds me fresh sea food right away and lots of it in small pieces right into my little mouth (+5 points); b) shouts at me, ‘You are a cat!’’ then a long time later gives me crunchy cat food and water (+1 point); c) Iam always full and mostly asleep (+10 points). 4, As acat, my human treats me: a) in full accordance with the Cat Bill of Rights: with the maximum respect due my royal lineage and sufficient gratitude that 1 deign to live with them (+1 point); b) like a wild animal loose in the house (-5 points); c) they don’t know I’m a cat (+20 points). How did you score? Nat as good as me, I bet. ‘Soft touch in the Horseshoe’ Turn left at Two Big Dog, right across from stinky orange cat. Call One-eyed Louie for more details. oy . oe t Then there would be an ad for cals who wanted to take Human Training Lessons. “Mecting staris at 3 p.m. behind the brown - shed, then under the back porch for screeching and fighting. (Refreshments).”” In the classified section, cats would trade info and objects. ‘‘Soft touch in the Horseshoe,’’ one ‘ ad might read, ‘‘Turn left at Two Big Dog, right across from stinky orange cat. Call One-eyed Louie for more details,” Another classified ad might say, ‘Available: one partly-dead mouse. Still has lots of good play in it. Great for the kids. Will trade for one mostly-dead bird.’” An editorial commentary might espouse the value of bringing a bat into the bedroom. '‘Bats Fun, Not Yucky," the headline would read. The editorialist might decry the human habit of shrieking and throwing them out after a cat goes to all the trouble of catching it and bringing it inside to show off and share the fun. I suppose to produce their magazine, there would need to be reporter cats with little cat pencils and pads of paper, editor cats, com- positor cats and circulation cats. And of course there would be ad sales cats with their little cat- sized plaid suit jackets, drinking endless cups of coffee in styrofoam cups and speeding around town, But all that industry and working to deadline would interfere (oo much with sleeping 18 hours a day, Staring out the window eats up an- other three hours a day, and then there’s all that time-consuming grooming, No, I guess the cats will Icave the publishing business to us humans, We seem to have the time for it. oo i IN A WEEK’S time Debbie McNeal of Gitwinksihlkw will be having breakfast with U.S. President Bill Clinton, The 42-year-old religious singer is one of six people from Canada who've becn invited to take part in the 46th National Prayer Break- fast in Washington. For the past 45 years members of the US con- gress, the president and other government officials have joined with guests from 160 countries to “recognize the reconciling power of prayer.”’ The conference takes place Feb, 3-6. McNeal will be representing First Na- tions singers from Canada, and is the only singer in- vited from this country. She’ll sing three songs she’s wrilten herself, and give two speeches. ‘Pm really honoured to be selected,’’ says McNeal. She’s chosen songs she hopes ‘‘will touch the presi- dent’s heart.” The invitation is even ‘My grandma said do good and good will come back. I guess I’m started to reap some of the good,”’ more surprising — since McNeal hasn’t been singing professionally for very long. Her first break came in 1995 during a sacred as- sembly, in Hull Quebec. The Salvation Army had selected her and her sister- inlaw, Loma Azak, to represent the church from Gitwinksihlkw. McNeal didn’t attend as a singer bul she made a num- ber of contacts during the concert and was perstaded to go to Montana the next month to record her first al- bum. Since then she’s travelled to eight countries, singing at religions assemblies. The largest took place in Argen- tina, where she sung in front of a crowd of 90,000. Although her recording career only recently began, McNeal has been writing songs since she was two years old. **Do Love’’ was the name of her first song and she used to sing it to her family with her brother. From there McNeal prog- ressed to singing in Sunday school, Her father was a pianist and band conductor, so she grew up around music. As a teen McNeal joined the Songster Brigade — a church choir. “ always though of music as a way of life,” she says. “Tt’s a way to express mysel.,”’ But she never dreamed she'd end up sing- ing in front of crowds of thousands. *“T would never have though this would have hap- pened to me,’’ she says. “My life just revolved around being a good mother and wife. I just tried to be a constructive member of the community. “My grandma said do good and good will come back. I guess I’m started to reap some of the good.”” As her career has prog- ressed McNeal has dis- covered that she’s one of the first native singers in B.C. to sing religious music. “Tt's hard because a lot of our people still can’t com- prehend it,” she says. “‘T don’t get much feedback ii YS SECTION B- for other aboriginal Christian singers. ther to the Christian nor native communi DEBBIE McNEAL, a religious singer from Gitwinksihikw, is breaking new ground McNeal sometimes feels she belongs nei- ty. But through her songs she combines the best of both and hopes to unite the two, from them.’? McNeal is Nisga’a, of the wolf tribe. She says she is received bet- ter abroad than she is among her own people. That’s probably because she’s taken elements of both native spirituality and Chris- tianity to form her songs. The result is something that fits well in neither. “There are things in my culture 1 choose to walk away from,’’ she says. ‘‘T take from both worlds and find my balance. She’s been called a traitor by other Nisga’a while some churches have said they don’t want her to sing wear- ing her trademark buckskin dress. However, McNeal sees her singing ability as a gilt from the Creator, and so has a duty to share it. She also is proud of her role in paving the way for other First Na- tions singers. But starting a career as a religious singer doesn’t pay many bills, McNeal may have recorded two albums, primarily at concerts, and doesn’t have a regular dis- tributor. Therefore she works two part time jobs, as a home school coordinator and a earning assistant aid while her husband is on long-term disability leave. McNeal says her goal with her singing is to reach out to people and show them the similarities that exist be- tween all of us. , “God created us all dif- ferent so the stew would be but she still has $30,000 perfect.”’ worth of tapes in her base- ment. She sells them Behind the spotlight Sant ALITTLE TO THE LEFT — Dan MaciXenzie adjusts a light for the upcoming play No Better Living. MacKenzie has done lights and set design professionally for large theatre companies and is volunteering for this play. IF DAN MacKENZIE is doing his job properly, no one will even notice the work he’s done. It doesn’t sound like great praise, but that’s how the lighting expert thinks. Terrace Little Theatre scored a big coup when it persuaded MacKenzie to design the lights for its up- coming play Better Living. MacKenzie has extensive experience in theatre, designing lights and sets for big theatre companies. Terrace isn’t productive ground for someone of MacKenzie’s craft, but an odd combination of cir- cumstances brought him back here. MacKenzie graduated from Caledonia Sr. Secondary about nine years ago. His interest in theatre was sparked early, and he left the University of Calgary with a BFA in theatre de- sign. There he learned the art of lighting, set, and costume design, and experimented with both acting and directing. Even before MacKenzie finished school he was working behind the stage. After graduation he freelanced as a designer/technician, once working [or three months straight without a day off. At that point he was employed by both of Calgary’s main theatre companies. He and his girlfriend then decided to take a break and travel around Europe. Along the way they married in Scotland, with help from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, whose members provided a wedding dress, shoes, a best man and more. Travel proved expensive, so the couple left Europe to come to ‘Terrace to visit Dan’s parents. His new wife Angela quickly found work and so they decided to stick around for a while. MacKenzie wanted to keep his skills up with light- ing and design, so he volunteered to work on Belfer Living. Designing lighting in the small space of the McColl Playhouse is a challenge for him. And the theatre company has a limited supply of special lights like dimmers. ‘Lighting design is an art form,’” says Mackenzie. “The light board, dimmers are like paints and brushes.”’ Instead of trying to mimic natural light during the play, MacKenzie is taking a non-realistic approach. And thal suils the biuck comedy, with its collection of oddball characters. If MacKenzie’s done his job properly, the audience won't notice the lighting. Instead the lights will help the actors achieve the eitect they want, he says.